


Samwena

by Thoughts Like A Minefield (Incog_Ninja)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Breaking the Fourth Wall, Gen, by Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-07-08
Packaged: 2020-06-24 20:21:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19731088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Incog_Ninja/pseuds/Thoughts%20Like%20A%20Minefield
Summary: PROMPT: Okay, last one before I tap out for the night. I want some snarky Rowena and petulant Sam and just fuck me up however you see fit. 😘😘😘





	Samwena

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stunudo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stunudo/gifts).



“ _Wh_ at is this?” Rowena asks, disgust clear in every aspect of her bewitchingly crafted (pun totally intended) features and her tiny but mighty frame.

Sam’s face is equally disturbed but in a different way – he’s like _indignant_. “It’s a dog, Rowena,” he says. “And don’t even start with me, Dean’s already thrown a fit over it.”

“I didn’t throw a fit,” I say, kicking my feet up onto the library table and sipping my whiskey, waiting for the real show to start because Rowena might as well be a cat as much as she clearly hates this dog. “I said you had to clean up its shit is all.”

“You said it with _that look_ ,” Sam snaps.

“ _That look_ ,” I echo into my glass as Rowena really ramps up. 

I need popcorn.

“Samuel,” she says, pink lips and flashing eyes – the whole nine. 

G _od_ , I wish you all could see this.

Sam looks half-terrified and half-turned on. I mean, Rowena… she’s a witch, but, _damn_ , she’s got that school teacher, spank you with a ruler vibe.

“Dogs are _death tolls_ and _scavengers_ ,” she says, annunciating every syllable in that lilting little brogue, shiny lips stretched tight over her sharp, bright teeth, and her glittery eyes narrowing.

This is getting _really_ good. More whiskey, please.

“And they’re _filthy_.” She sneers down her nose at the ball of fluff that Sam found outside, literally scavenging for food.

Thankfully, he gave her a bath. But then he also like cleaned her teeth? And gave her some kind of deworming thing, and he’s taking her to the vet tomorrow. I don’t know…

“Rowena, you don’t even live here,” Sam says, and I nod because he has a point, and Rowena snaps her glare on me.

I shift uncomfortably in my seat. It’s not like she _scares_ me, really, but… witch, ya know?

“Plus, she’s only here until the humane society calls to let me know they have room for her,” Sam says, crouching down to scratch the little bundle of fur. “And she’s like five pounds, you guys are being ridiculous.”

I have to admit Sam looks pretty pleased with the situation. Personally, I like dogs just fine; they’re fun and badass. I just don’t like their messes.

“Is she really a dog, though?” I wonder aloud. “Dogs are supposed to be,” I motion largely with my hands for emphasis. “Big, right? She’s more like a _cat_.” Then I sneeze from the mere mention of a cat and receive blessings from both Sam and Rowena.

Samwena. _LOL_

Sam gives me that prissy pinched look as he lifts the white fluff into his arms. She rolls to her back and he scratches her belly. “She’ll sleep in my room, I’ll take her out to do her business,” Sam says. “Do you need to go outside to do some business?” Sam fucking _coos_ at this dog.

And, I swear to everything, I have never in my life… 

Rowena looks at me with alarm equal to mine in her eyes. 

She sighs and rolls her own eyes. “Fine,” she says, dragging her gaze back to Sam as he bounces the silky, white fluff like a brand-new baby, grinning down at it. “It _obviously_ makes you happy, just… keep her out of the infirmary and the cellar.”

Rowena has her own names for the places she works when she’s here. I don’t care what she calls anything – she can call the kitchen Disney World for all I care, as long as she does her job and cleans up after herself. Unlike this dog.

Huh. I guess she really is like a cat.

Sam continues to coo at the dog as he heads toward the stairs to take it out to do its “business.” Rowena actually follows him.

“Where’re _you_ goin’?” I ask her, and she throws me her own indignant look over her shoulder.

“I need supplies,” she says, fluttering her lashes.

I arch a brow. “The garage is _that way_ , Rowena,” I say, thumbing over my shoulder in the opposite direction. “Or, you could call Cas like a normal fucking bunker inhabitant.”

She is _so_ following Sam and that dog. She _wants_ to follow Sam and that dog. _Oh, my god_ … She’s legit into that fucking dog!

Rowena flips her hair and sniffs. “I’d like a bit of fresh air first,” she says, looking up at Sam as he smirks down at her. “Shoo!” She waves him away, and he turns with a full grin back to the stairs and climbs slowly, still cooing and rubbing noses with the dog.

Rowena begins to question him about the dog’s habits as their voices fade and the bunker door slams shut. 

And then I laugh loud and long at the image of Rowena, tottering around with a 5-pound Maltese in one of her handbags, dictating orders at Sam and generally taking over his life.

Kinda makes me all warm inside.

 _Samwena_. lollllllllll


End file.
